


May This Confession Be the Start

by starryeyedsea



Category: Vision of Escaflowne
Genre: F/M, Fluff, Post-Canon
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2010-07-20
Updated: 2010-07-20
Packaged: 2017-10-10 17:04:25
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,859
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/102065
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/starryeyedsea/pseuds/starryeyedsea
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>They knew it in their hearts, but some things still need to be said.</p>
            </blockquote>





	May This Confession Be the Start

**Author's Note:**

> Takes place between the last scene in Zaibach and where Hitomi goes home. It is basically the conversation we should have seen but didn't. This is sappy as all hell, but I quite frankly don't care, the two needed to talk to each other and get it all out. Title taken from the song "Elaborate Lives" from the Musical "Aida".

Hitomi felt the world just fade away as she and Van soared into the sky. She barely noticed that Dornkirk's spirit had disappeared, or the creaking of the now unfunctioning Atlantis machine.

In that one moment it was as if the world just faded away and her and Van were really the only ones that existed. There was nothing else but Van's scent and the firmness of his chest, and the sound of his heartbeat which mixed with the sound of her own.

_He came for me! He really came!_

She couldn't form words, she just relished the moment. She loved Van. Loved him in ways that she had never loved anyone before. She felt reborn, as if all the worries and the pain that she had been feeling since she first came to Gaea (and maybe even before that) were just wasting away. It was like she was starting over, and today was the beginning of one brand new life.

She wondered if Van felt the same way, but the tiny spec of fear still lodged in her heart kept her from pulling her head out of his chest and looking at him.

She was so caught up in these new feelings that she barely noticed when her feet touched the ground. They stood there just a moment, still embracing and neither of them really wanted to let go.

In the end it was Van who moved first as he placed his hands to her shoulders and gently pushed her away to where he could look at her. His wings had already disappeared into his back leaving only a few trails of feathers behind. Hitomi took a few further steps back to fully regain composure.

It felt like at that moment that she woke up, and she turned her head to look at the surroundings. They were on a roof of a building that was adjacent to the main Zaibach palace.

"Where are we?" she asked.

"I don't know," he said, "my wings were growing tired so I guess I just landed here."  Van looked down and absentmindedly scratched his head. Hitomi quieted a small giggle.

"Where's Escaflowne?" she asked.

"I left it behind," he said, "it acted up and I had to…"  He stopped, and she knew he wasn't quite ready to put what just had occurred into words. Hitomi thought back to everything that lead up to this. The image of Van about to kill Allen became stuck in her mind.

"Oh, and what about Allen? Did you?" she asked.

"No," he said, "your voice. It stopped me just in time. He was reunited with his sister."  "His sister?"

"Yes, apparently Dilandau is Allen's sister," he said, and then smiled reassuringly to what must have been the confused look on her face.

"Don't worry, I don't really understand it either, but him and his men are fine and I think the battle must have ended by now," he said.

She nodded.

"I see," she said, "so everyone is okay."  It was only then that she recalled the image of Folken's mangled body on the floor of Zaibach palace and she felt a sense of shame.

"Listen, Van, about Folken," she said and she noted how the look on his face grew suddenly somber.

"I tried to stop him, I tried to warn him, but he still," she said, "it's all my fault. I tried, but he just went ahead and I could nothing."  Van opened his mouth to speak, but Hitomi kept going. She needed to get this all out. She was remembering every time something went wrong. The attack during Dryden and Millerna's wedding, Chid, Allen getting hurt, the destruction of Fanelia.

"I made such a mess of things, Folken wouldn't have even faced Dornkirk if it wasn't for me. I brought him there," she said, "all of this has been my fault. Everyone getting hurt, and worried, and you have to fight all the time. I have been a burden to everyone."  She couldn't stop the tears, but rather she let them flow.

"Hitomi, it isn't all your fault," he said awkwardly, he wasn't used to situations like this.

"I think…I think it was everyone's fault. Folken would have gone anyways and this thing would have been dragged out even more. You shouldn't blame yourself," he said.

"Still, I didn't help things at all."  "Maybe not all the time, but Hitomi. You saved me so many times. I would have never made it home if it hadn't been for you!"  She looked up at him.   "But…"  "You have saved me so many times. Helped me so many times," he said, "you never looked at me with fear or apprehension. You would listen to me and you cared. I think you're pretty amazing. It's why I…"  He pauses to breathe. He hadn't let out a breath from the moment he had begun speaking and Hitomi could only stare at him for a moment. He wasn't looking her in the eye but she detected a slight flush to his cheeks.   
It was then that the other half of the equation dawned on her.

_Don't die Hitomi!_  _I promise I will get you home, whether it is to Allen or the Mystic Moon._  _I want you! I want…I want your power_

_Oh I get it, you're just worried about Allen!_  
 _He loves me,_ she thought, _he has loved me all along._  She had to fight from letting the feeling of joy wash completely over her at that realization, there were still things that needed to be said. But he loved her, and she mentally berated herself for not knowing sooner, how much easier things could have gone had she realized her own feelings and his sooner.

_We're idiots,_ she thought, _Neither of us really understood what we were feeling. We should have been honest with ourselves earlier._

"Van," she said, and she knew it was time to face it, to get it out, the subject that they had avoided since they had landed. "I am sorry."  He looked at her again.

"I told you, there is nothing to apologize for."  "No, not for that," she said, "it's about Allen."  She noticed him go stiff for a moment.

"What about Allen?"  "When I got to Gaea, I was scared," she said, "I didn't know what was going to happen to me, and Allen felt…"  She struggled for a moment, because it was just now that hindsight was catching up to her.

"He felt familiar. He felt safe, because he reminded me of someone back home and he just seemed so confident and like a dream," she said, "but even at the heart of it all. I didn't trust him."  And she looked up and made sure that she made contact with Van's sight.

"I never trusted him. Not like I trusted you."  She could feel him still, even though they weren't touching, and had Hitomi thought a bit about their surroundings, she might have become embarrassed. A war had just ended, they were still in enemy territory and Van wasn't wearing his shirt. But she needed, no she wanted to get this out. There needed to be no secrets, no doubts about anything left between them. Of that she was certain.

"You say that I am amazing, but Van, you're the one whose amazing. I could have never lost my home and be able to make it through the way you have. I never believed that you wouldn't come through. I worried a lot about you, but I never really doubted you, even when you seemed determined to run off and get yourself killed. You always came. You came in the end."  She just barely registered Van taking a deep breath but she continued.

"And through all that Van, you made me want to be better. I want to be there for you, to give you no reason to doubt me, and I want to be able to give you back the strength and the security that you have given me. Everything here on Gaea has been so tumultuous so confusing, but you have been constant. I want to be able to be to you everything that you are to me."  Hitomi takes a step closer and just barely kills the urge to take his hand.

"The truth is and I know you must have heard me earlier, but I still want to say it. I love you Van. I love you more than I can say right now. I love you more than I have loved anything in my life. That is sappy and silly, and I am only 16, but it is true. I love you, Van."  And now it is Hitomi's turn to breathe, and she looks down not quite ready to face his reaction. She feels him take his own step closer to her and she holds her breath.

"Hitomi…I," he says and she feels the presence of his hand as if he is trying to figure out how he could take her in arms and she smiles to herself. Van was never good with words, she should have remembered this. It was her turn to be strong, to be true to her word.

She looks up and meets his gaze. His eyes were clear and they looked a bit different from how they did before, like all the weight he had been carrying since his coronation had suddenly lifted.

"Yes," she said and inched closer, and they were now so close almost as close as they were before.

"May I kiss you?" he asked, his voice low and almost a whisper, and Hitomi literally felt him tremble. She knew he wouldn't be able to say it in words, but it was alright, he didn't need to. She already knew.

She blushed and smiled a bit, before leaning.

"Of course," she said before pressing her lips softly against his.

It was short and sweet and quite chase, but he felt him awkwardly wrap his arms around her waist and she pressed her palms to his chest, and when he pulled away they were both silently grasping for air.

"We should get back," he says, not letting go.

Hitomi nodded, and brought her hand to her mouth as if to reassure herself of what just happened.

"We should, I think I gave Merle quite a scare earlier," she said, "I didn't exactly explain what was going on."  He nodded, and pulled her closer as he let his wings once again unfurl from his back.

"Before we go, can you do one more thing?" she asks.

"Anything," he replies.

"I know it doesn't really need to be said, but I would like you to say it."  He nods and leans in slightly and as he pulls her in close and gently whispers into her ear:  "I love you Hitomi."  

And with that he feels his hand on the back of her legs as he scoops her up and launches into the air, and even though it was Van who had the wings, Hitomi didn't need them to feel like she was already flying.


End file.
